chances of bad news at 20 week scan mumsnet

Baby loss stories He had to come to the decision by himself. Very occasionally this second scan cannot be completed, for example because: In this case you will not be offered another screening scan but you will offered an all over physical examination for your baby after birth. I can feel my child kick, it responds when he shouts at football - I mean literally, this baby used to dance around whenever he'd like scream at a goal - and there cannot be anything wrong with this child because it's part of us already. You might be offered another test to find out for certain if your baby has one of the conditions. Just doing it. I was young, I didn't need one. It doesn't remove the guilt, but I don't know what else to do. My partner really wanted me to, and by that time I had no sense of what was right or what I should do. You may need to have a full bladder when you come for the appointment. Just that really! Mumsnet carries some affiliate marketing links, so if you buy something through our posts, we may get a small share of the sale (more details here). And I assumed my partner would feel the same. I sat and waited to be called for my scan. Though the 18-20 week scan can detect when certain parts of the baby's body have grown abnormally, it may not be possible for clinicians to identify why it has happened or make a firm diagnosis based on the scan alone. It is essential that all practitioners performing fetal anomaly ultrasound screening should be trained to communicate abnormal findings to women, as such information is likely to have significant emotional impact. He looked fine. All my instincts were to protect my belly, yet here I was allowing someone to stick a huge needle into it. Desperately trying to hold onto the glimmer of hope we'd been given. I had my little leaflet, printed off leaflet about choroid plexus cysts. I think the whole experience has made me a pretty nasty person. We decided that we wanted medication to help me. Living in this world must be unbearable for them. I've realised that being a nice person is a luxury some can't afford. The scan was inconclusive, but the size of my little bump was measuring a lot smaller than it should have for 10 weeks. We needed closure, to allow us to grieve properly. We'll make an appointment with the senior sonographer, the consultant at the local hospital, and she'll do your scan and she'll be able to tell you more things'. My mum arrived early to look after our son, and my partner and I got a cab to the hospital. All the time, the baby was kicking and I felt like a murderer waiting to strike her victim. So instead, I was advised to go home and let nature take its course. Previous scans in this pregnancy and with my first child had been fun - a chance to see the baby wriggling around and perhaps find out its sex. blood tests, CVS) were clear - and as one woman put it, 'after the triple test* (Down's syndrome screening) you stop thinking anything can go wrong'. My partner's face was lit up, seeing the baby for the first time. The baby was kicking so hard that I began to believe him. There is more detailed information about the main conditions that are looked for during this scan on NHS.UK. We've got the same battle scars. No, you couldn't see there was anything wrong. He was tiny, perfect and a Down's syndrome baby. She describes having to make a momentous decision very quickly, and the ferment of relief, guilt and grief that followed, Original reporting and incisive analysis, direct from the Guardian every morning. Being generous and kind generally happens only when you're happy. Could you tell? I hadn't thought about the mechanics of such a late termination, but had assumed it would mean some kind of operation. They would then re-test me in two days time. A long process of blood tests, scans, doctors and hospitals. But they didn't. Abortion has never raised any moral dilemmas for me and I am an atheist, so there are no religious issues. Our baby was beautiful. It was positive, and I felt elated. This image shows a baby's face and hands at 20 weeks, and gives you an idea of what you'll be able to see at this scan. x. Which she reassured us that she'd be absolutely fine, this was a one-off. Again the legs were quite twisted, they said that the baby's sternum was very short - things weren't in proportion you know - the head was quite large, the neck was very thick, there wasn't really like a neck as such it was just things were kind of - there were lots of things that obviously the consultant could see that we weren't aware of. Registered office: Nicholas House, 3 Laurence Pountney Hill, London, EC4R 0BB. Scans cannot find all conditions. Some people we talked to had not had a 18-20-week scan, either because their babies' abnormalities had been detected by earlier . We didn't feel we could tell anyone what was happening. Trying to carry on as normal, working and putting on a brave face. Please ask your hospital about this before your appointment. And nothing prepares you at all. As I was called for my scan I was nervous and emotional. It was another consultant, who said, "I'm afraid I have some bad news - your baby has Down's syndrome." The thing about that which I felt was difficult is that we could tell when being scanned that there was something very seriously wrong. Saturday came. We need to have your opinion'. At this point it wasn't looking great. Within it are a number of recommendations for the communication of findings from ultrasounds. The doctor told me he was 98% sure this was a failing twin pregnancy. Baby loss support Well, at the regional hospital it was a 3-D scan. A company limited by guarantee registered in England and Wales company number 3266897. Mm-hm. We've joined the grown-ups and we both feel very different. And that, that was when things where it started going a bit wrong. And the local hospital wanted to send us off to the regional hospital to actually confirm that, and were not really prepared to say at that time that there was something very seriously wrong. Has anyone been told the sex incorrectly at their 20 week scan? I let out an animal scream and [wife] kind of leapt onto me on the bed. Again, no notes can have been written down because the midwife asked the same question. At first, I still had to deal with the physical implications of having given birth. By 7pm, I still hadn't delivered the baby. As I waited for the doctor back on the EPU unit. Please note that the opinions expressed by users in Tommys Book of #misCOURAGE are solely those of the user, who is unlikely to have had medical training. My partner tried to remain calm, and at my request rang my mum. After preparing myself to face having to take the medication. We were told to go to the hospital immediately. You've had, you've had your Down's Syndrome check and that's okay. Originally I hadn't wanted to go down that road. For once in my life, I had been organised. I still feel guilty, I still cry at random times. I loved him instantly and didn't want to let him go. Two days, after on Christmas Eve, (my 12 week date) I had more blood tests. So I trusted him. At that point, I got very not upset but quite sort of strongly severe sort of with the people at the hospital saying, 'Look, you know, that's 24 hours, possibly a 48 hours' wait - that's not something that's tenable. So it was just, we were coming up to the 20-week scan and I was just getting more relaxed, just actually starting to look at maybe baby catalogues or, you know, going down the baby aisle at the shops, which I'd always avoided. 18-20 week scans provide clinicians with more information than earlier scans because by18 weeks a healthy baby should be larger and better developed. You have accepted additional cookies. And also what the prognosis would mean for our two year old: now a very happy child, he would have a completely different childhood with such an ill sibling. I want to be happy again. And they took me to another room and they explained that the baby had what they thought was ventriculomegaly or something. And I remember, the first thing I remember when something might be wrong, was I saw, I finally, we finally saw an image of the skull on the screen, and there appeared to be a sort of black hole shape in the middle. The 18-20 week antenatal scan and further tests. I wanted to let nature take its course. Usually, sonographers will ask a senior sonographer colleague to confirm findings and this should be done immediately. And it's, I can't remember exactly what it was now, it's about where the brain is supposed to form. I think what everyone is saying is that most likely outcome is that there are no problems at all. The decision to terminate the pregnancy was my partner's and mine. I remained positive, we researched lots of cases of mistaken dates, inconclusive scans, and compared them to our situation; scrutinising everything to try and believe it was all one big misunderstanding. Tissue paper will be tucked around your clothing to protect it from the ultrasound gel, which will then be put on your tummy. This was on the Friday. DS had 2 soft markers: talipes (club foot) and 'echogenic locii' somewhere - heart I think. He felt doing more blood tests would only cause me more discomfort and false hope. The first words I said were: "If there's anything wrong then it's my fault", I had been working 70, nearly 80 hours the previous weeks and pushed myself hard. Anyway we went in for the meeting with the consultant on this particular time, and we'd got to, I was 30 weeks pregnant by then. As you felt that, you know, it was probably going to show lots of problems and it just wasn't what we wanted, but at the same time we needed to sort of see it and, we needed to prove it I suppose. I felt more informed, and I felt that that was what I needed in my head to see you know, that I've got to accept now that this, all these things are real on the screen and this was really my baby that's suffering all these things [sighs], but I was sad as well. We just couldn't use the words. It is a noise that will stay with me for ever. He felt strong and fit and healthy. Seeing your baby on a screen can be really exciting. Is it the same scan or is it the same equipment? I give pregnant women dirty looks. But for those few days they were torture. Public Health England (PHE) created this information on behalf of the NHS. Maybe. And I can, the words that the scanning member of staff used, "Everything's fine", will stay with me forever. I faced another internal scan where I began to feel helpless and alone. And at that point I don't think we, I don't think we realised that there might have to be a decision, because we'd talked about it with, with Down's and the other possible problems, but at this point it was, well okay what can be done to fix the problem - because yes the heart's not developing properly but there must be something we can do. Severe chromosomal conditions such as Edwards' syndrome are now often picked up in the first trimester antenatal screening but itwill usually be more obviousat the 18- 20 week scan, though usually a firm diagnosis will not be made until one or two specialists have weighed up all available evidence about the baby - which usually means that another expert needs to scan the baby again, or until the woman has had an amniocentesis. We were denying him his life. Somehow, I walked from the sofa up to the bathroom and told my partner. Soon, the doctor came and inserted the tablets that would induce labour.

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